If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Romans 18:12

I’ve been thinking about this verse a lot recently. What does it mean to live at peace with everyone? Specifically, people you are in relationship with. Living at peace with those around you – those who you don’t know well – those who aren’t intimately a part of your life….this makes sense to me. Be graceful. Assume the best. Choose not to be offended.

And of course these same standards should be applied in dealing with those that you know and love, but there is a different dimension to these relationships that has to be considered: speaking YOUR truth. Not in the “confronting” and “speaking the Truth in love” sense…but in an “I need to tell you the truth of how I feel” sense. So my question: When are we supposed to let things slide…deal with them within ourselves…let the Lord be our “vengeance”?

I’ve never been good about saying how I feel. I don’t trust my emotions and I am more likely to blow them off, bail or stuff how I am feeling rather than saying it. That leads to bitterness, passive aggressive behavior and misplaced anger. And, sometimes, broken relationships. But it has also lead to the appearance of “peace” at times – albeit, a false peace.

So, my question is…and I think I know the answer…what does it mean to live at peace with everyone…as far as it depends on you? If it depends on me, what is my role?

As I have pondered this over the last few weeks, I’ve found that it comes down to this question for me: when the following two ideals are in conflict, is peace within myself the goal, or simply peace with others? I have more often than not, chosen peace with others to the sacrifice of myself…my own peace. And that is not peace. It is false. It is insincere. It is artificial. Not only that, but the by-products of this counterfeit peace (several mentioned above) cause discord, anger and confusion. And we know that God is not the author of confusion.

So, I’m working on it. I’m trying to learn to identify how I feel…why I feel that way…take it to God and, with His blessing, speak MY truth. So that, I can live in peace with others, as far as it depends on me. Then I can lay my head down at night knowing that nothing has gone un-said. Knowing that someone else’s reaction to what I had to say is up to them. That I am at peace with myself, and with the other person, as far as it depends on me.